Many people strongly prefer the mediation approach, and a large percentage of all cases are resolved this way. Unfortunately though, some divorcing couples are simply not right for mediation, and are advised to get a lawyer on their side to protect them. This is needed if there is physical or emotional abuse, and may be needed if one partner must dominate or control the other partner.
If you are excessively fearful that your former partner will grossly manipulate, coerce or bully you into giving them what they want, and that your needs will not be heard or respected, then your case is not right for mediation.
If you think mediation is a good way to get what you want, and you will to insist on everything going your way (no compromise), without listening to and respecting your partner’s needs, you should reconsider this, or forego mediation.
If you believe the mediator will take your side, or that you can win over the mediator to be more sympathetic for you than your partner, you should reconsider this, or forego mediation.
If your partner is resisting your divorce decision and not cooperating with your requests to physically separate, the mediation process will likely be used for more avoidance and delay, rather than constructive steps to resolution.
If your partner is dependent on alcohol or other substances or has a pattern of avoidance or projection of blame, they will probably not be able to engage constructively with a cooperative mediation process and will likely use it for more avoidance and projection of blame.
If you do not trust that your partner will voluntarily disclose to you accurate financial information, and might even actively conceal income or assets, then mediation may not be right for you.
If there are real issues concerning the safety of you or your children, due to the past violent actions or threats of your former partner, you should disclose this to the mediator, and immediately seek separate legal assistance and protection.